"Hey, there. How are you doing?”
As my former co-worker walked up, I smiled, ready for a good chat.
But after a while, the conversation went there. He started talking about the charismatic, but truly evil person we had both worked for. This boss was the first person I’d ever known who actually plotted to emotionally hurt people and try to destroy their jobs (telling me they deserved it). I had been naïve and trusting…and I had ended up burned badly with my professional confidence shaken and my trusting heart shattered.
So part of me felt a bit of satisfaction as he told me that though the former boss was still evil, the person was, several years later, facing negative results of the bad behavior—not major trauma, just a little come-uppance.
After my former coworker and I went on our different ways, I felt slightly vindicated. Though that charming boss had pulled the wool over others’ eyes and still routinely tried to destroy others, at least not everything was smooth sailing.
After my excruciating experience with that person, I had moved on to a better place, to a place I know the Lord had for me. But later that day, after talking with the former coworker, my mind and heart started to replay all the horror that boss had inflicted. I felt the emotional bile rise. I started to feel the panic, fear, and depression all over again.
Then God stepped in.
Over the past weeks, I’ve been contemplating the New Year and all it means for us as humans and Christians. The scripture the Holy Spirit has continually seemed to press on my mind during this time is Philippians 3:13-14 (NASB), “Forgetting what lies behind and reaching forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.”
As I thought about this scripture, the Lord had brought to my mind the image of a white board. At the new year, in some ways we get a new beginning. In many ways, at least figuratively, we are allowed to wipe the board clean of all of the marks of the previous year. We can start with a fresh board and write upon it.
I thought about that today as I wanted to throw up from remembered tension. No, I realized, the Lord had moved me on. The board was clean. I needed to remind myself of that. I needed to remember to forget, and to continue to press on to where I am in my life now, to where the Lord is continually calling me to go.
So as this new year starts, where is your focus? Are you looking behind . . . or looking ahead?
Is the white board of your life all marked up? Do you need to ask the Holy Spirit to help you take an eraser to it?
Has your board been cleaned…but you’re tempted to focus on what it used to look like, or are tempted to pick up the markers and scribble old images of pain and defeat? Don’t. Forget what is behind. Write new words of hope, healing, and faith.
And as you do—as we do—we’ll be closer and closer to reaching that goal.
