It happens to all of us. At times we're tempted to feel overwhelmed by the challenges we face. Life is not easy for any of us! And sometimes it's harder than other items.
One of the keys to making it through the tough times is having the love and help of friends. So how can you be a good friend and help someone through difficult or dark days?
1. Pray for your friend. Pray as you go through the day, interceding for your friend. Pray scriptures over your friend such as Proverbs 3:5-6: "Lord, I pray that Anne will trust you with all of her heart and not lean on her own understanding. Help her acknowledge you in all her ways and to realize you will make her paths straight."
2. Besides praying for your friend, offer to pray with your friend.
3. Be present. Sometimes when we're enduring a hard time, we just need someone to know about it and be present physically and emotionally. Carve some time out of your schedule for your friend and invite him or her to join you in a relaxed atmosphere.
4. Listen to your friend's doubts and fears without downplaying them. Validate the person's right to feel the way he or she feels, and take the concerns seriously.
5. Ask gently probing questions to help the person think through the issues involved. If the person is consumed with worry, ask, "What's the worst that you feel could happen? How would you respond to that? Can you take any actions that would make this better?" Perhaps help the person create an action plan. Also ask the person, "What's the best that could happen in this situation? Which do you feel is most likely to happen? What would make it less worrisome for you?"
6. Remind the person of God's care-that the Lord is near to those who call on Him, that He loves us and is looking out for us and that He has promised to be with us no matter what we go through. Ask the person where he or she thinks God is in this scenario. Encourage the person to remember that Romans 8:26 tells us the Holy Spirit intercedes for us when we do not know what to pray.
7. Follow up. Ask the person how he or she is doing. Be willing to listen further, even if he or she rehashes all the points with you. Ask if the person has been praying. Keep encouraging him or her to seek God in the matter and feel His nearness. Help your friend find the positives that have happened without downplaying his or her fears and feelings.
8. As you continue to pray and care, send occasional texts or emails of encouragement, reminding your friend that you are praying.
9. Look to see if there are practical ways you can meet your friend's needs during the anxious or difficult time.
10. Continue to be there for your friend. Weep with those who weep, cheer with those who are seeing good things happen.
It takes time and energy to be a good friend and to help someone through a tough, doubting time. But in doing so, we are offering the ministry of Christ in the flesh.
