Love according to kids
Sometimes we run out of wise advice on love, so we ask kids about it.
Eric, age 6, was asked, "What exactly is marriage?"
He said, "Marriage is when you get to keep your girl and don't have to give her back to her parents!"
Kally, age 9, was asked, "How do you decide who to marry?"
"You flip a nickel," she said, "heads means you stay with him. Tails means you try the next one."
Eddie, age 6, was asked how to tell if two people are married.
He said, "If they're yellin' at the same kids, they're married."
When asked if it's better to be single or married, Will, age 7, said, "It gives me a headache to think about that stuff. I'm just a kid. I don't need that kind of trouble."
I was like Will when I was a kid. I thought love was strange. I remember looking at very old and wrinkly people-probably in their thirties-and thinking that love is a bit like an ice cream cone. It may be good at the start, but then it gets all drippy and goes downhill.
I couldn't have been further from the truth. Having been married 37 years, I can say that it keeps getting better. The butterflies aren't so dominant as you age, but being loved long-term by one who has seen you first thing in the morning, knows your flaws, and yet is committed to you, is simply unbeatable.
Here are a few tips we've picked up along the way:
Never scream at each other unless the house is on fire.
Never both be angry at the same time.
Never let the sun go down on your wrath. Stay up and fight.
Smooch before parting.
At least once a day say "I love you."
Go looking for things to encourage, for kind things to say.
Don't bring up past mistakes.
If you find something to criticize mention 28 positive things first.
Ramona and I are still married because we're good repenters and forgivers.
Tim Keller wrote: "We must say to ourselves something like this: 'Well, when Jesus looked down from the cross, He didn't think, "I am giving Myself to you because you are so attractive to Me." No, He was in agony, and He looked down at us-denying Him, abandoning Him, and betraying Him-and in the greatest act of love in history, He stayed. He loved us, not because we were lovely to Him, but to make us lovely. That is why I am going to love my spouse.' Speak to your heart like that, and then fulfill the promises you made on your wedding day."
This reminds me of the words of Gavin, age 9, who was asked why couples hold hands. He said, "They want to make sure their rings don't fall off because they paid good money for them."
Phil Callaway is host of Laugh Again. His 27th book Laugh Like A Kid Again (Harvest House) will release in June.
